And The Lord hath taken away; Blessed be the name of The Lord.
Last night, after an evening of celebration with the family for 32 years of marriage, my mother went to be with The Lord.
Words cannot describe how much we grieve, and yet, there’s peace.
Are we sad? Yes.
Do we cry? Yes.
Do we miss her? Yes!
Do we want her back? Yes a thousand times!
But, the Knowledge of God’s sovereignty is a great comfort. He never does anything on a whim, so even though we were caught off guard, we know that God is working all for his glory.
I don’t think I ever truly understood – or at least never experienced – the verse that says something along the lines of “We sorrow not as those without hope” until now.
There is truly hope, peace, even joy in knowing that mom went to be with her savior. It is certainly a peace that passes all understanding. I don’t even understand it. I simply know that God shall supply all our needs, that He is sovereign, and that even a bird doesn’t fall to the ground without His knowledge.
I don’t think there’s anything more secure than that, and it brings me great joy to know that that’s the Savior my mom put her faith in, and who she is now with.
My mom used to worry a lot, and it makes me smile to think that she’ll never worry again. Then I cry when I realize that Garrett will never remember her, and that her future grandchildren will never meet her. The love she had for her grand babies is beautiful.
I’m not looking forward to tomorrow, or to the funeral. I don’t want to see mom in a casket. I don’t want to see the tears. I don’t want to shed the tears.
But I’m looking forward to a future, secure in the knowledge that my Savior is executing his plan, in His time, for His glory, and that I don’t need to understand it, I simply need to trust. And I’m thankful that He gave me a mother for almost 28 years.
Our ways are not His ways, our thoughts are not his thoughts. For His ways are higher than ours.
P.S. My brother wrote a beautiful tribute to our mother here.